got a chance to meet baby today due to his medical check up.
feels so happy to be with my darling.
being together to forget about reality. or something like that.
it just feels real good to have him by my side.
how i wished time could stop.
i really dont want him to go away.

seems kinnda funny. as though my boy is going for a war or something and not coming back.
but the feeling is somewhat lik that ah.
plus field camp really makes me feel very drama.
is lik those older days where the guy go for war and no news from him. -.-
and the feeling sux.

feeling slightly better today.
it feels good to be normal i guess. to think normally also.
to think that you dont have to be the best, coz you are just an ordinary person.dont needa be afraid of losing, cause there is nothing to lose in the first place.
i feel peaceful for few moments, before i remember why i need to stand out, and think of the consequences of not being the best, plainly cause being the best u will get all the best things. and i want it.
perhaps its really fine to be normal. perhaps thats the way it should be to make me feel better, to stop me from sinking deeper. i just need to be normal.

hope my negativeness dont set in into this peace that i feel.
jus a twist, being normal will be being ivisible, and i will always be forgotten.

i miss you baby, really.